THE FUTURE WHEN BEING IN THE FLOW OF LIFE

The lesson I have learned so far is that I am always in recovery. It is there in the back of my mind and also a part of daily life now and in the future. It does not mean for me to expect less from my life but to be more in charge when I have setbacks. Before when I had a relapse I would have asked for more help when I felt more anxious, but now I make an appointment with myself at my kitchen table in order to face the relapse and find a solution.

I now accept that the future can bring good experiences compared to before when the future was seen as a time full of problematic events accompanied by low self-esteem and low energy levels. It is not that I take for granted my well being but I do look forward to developing my involvement and trying to get closer and closer to the real meaning of my life. I am looking for more than to just “make do” and be on the margins of society. I want to be involved in this project of life just as any other person.

In a nutshell if I want to describe what happened when I started regaining meaning in my life, my first focus was to bring back balance back into my life. I developed my self confidence with insights and improved my interactions with others. The process means to be in this flow of life with my full energy. Being responsible for my life situation is the best goal I can ever have in life.

Sylvie Albert

SINCE MY EARLY FORTIES

My recovery is not just for myself and for my life-I also want to help create a better environment in which others can explore the meaning of mental illness in their own lives. Since I have more energy living a meaningful life I wish all patients would also have an opportunity to fulfill their goal. Society has a more important role to play on acknowledging patients’ roles in all spheres of activities as full time citizens and should encourage them.

When I realized that the person in charge (the seeking mind in me) was able to take more decisions than I thought, I noticed that well being became concrete and not just another unattainable goal. Nevertheless there is no magic because I do have to make deals with myself; to be in charge of my failures and not making others responsible for them. It helps me to focus on improving my life conditions. The payoff is that people tell me I adapt, that I am more flexible. It is the same goal that they have with so called normal life.

However, my achievements are never a done deal because I continuously need to fine tune my attitude toward my life as if it was a precious gem. What I mean is that there is no guarantee that I will regain my full potential but the goal is to be part of the adventure as an actor, not a spectator. I don’t want to put a mask and pretend I have recovered 100% of my mental health and there is a cure out there. Any road I take will be a bumpy road and this is the blessing; I am resilient enough to navigate on this road and I will find ways to accept the bumps and welcome challenges.
(Part 3 to be continued next week...)

Sylvie Albert

The main purpose for me is to regain the meaning of my life. It is a complex process but nonetheless it is achievable. When I started regaining hope (with treatments and support) I realized there was more to life than being stable or compliant. Yes it was a cornerstone in improving my functioning when I accepted to be treated but well being is more complex than a cure recipe.

Paradoxically I really had to put myself in a context where I was on the same level as other citizens and not in a protected environment where sick people survive (are put). It is always a challenge because I face my own limits on one hand and I have to deal with prejudices and stigmas in society on the other.

SINCE 1998

I want to feel like a full time citizen and so I get involved in my activities with a resilient attitude. With this frame of mind I can appreciate my participation rather than feel overwhelmed with what is unfair or detrimental to people with a mental disorder. In my early forties I became ready to take on a more complete role in society when I realized I could improve my relationships with other people and that there is no shame in having a mental disorder. I started to go to support groups at AMI-Quebec and get together meetings with other patients in the late 90’s. I learned from these discussions that recovery works in so far as I participate in the process of well-being. There is a genuine approach according to my values.

I don’t believe in preachers or therapists who tell me that a couple of intensive therapy week-ends or a program of activities will resolve a mental health disorder. There is no quick fix but I do believe I can deepen my life values to maximize my chances to feel a part of the world around me just as other people with no mental disorder diagnosis do.
(Part 2 to be continued next week...)

Sylvie Albert

"A REASON TO HOPE - A MEANS TO COPE"

I was very pleased with the recent presentation of Mike's Story at the Lac Brome Community Center. There were about 75 people who came to hear him. Instead of an ordinary guy like Mike, I had been looking for a 'big name' to come and do a presentation for a long time. After doing some research I realized that having a celebrity come to Knowlton would be far too expensive, so I had pretty much given up the idea - but I couldn't let it go completely.

I had already heard about Mike Santoro but didn't know if he did presentations so I phoned him at AMI-Quebec where he worked, and asked him. When he answered "Yes", I told him I was looking for a real person with a real mental illness. I had no idea how Mike would react to this kind of request, but his response was "That's me!"

That first conversation led to many more emails and phone calls. We were becoming friends even before we actually met. I met Mike for the first time the morning of the presentation and it was like we were already fast friends. Mike and I realized that we were on the same page, working for the same cause. We had already both discovered that with effort, discipline, perseverance and taking responsibility anyone with a mental illness can have a good life - "A REASON TO HOPE. THE MEANS TO COPE."

So the date was set for Mike to come to present his 80/20 Project, the Community Center was booked and posters were made - but I had no idea yet how to pay for everything. My new philosophy was becoming "You don't ask, you don't know", and so I started asking. The first person I approached was a friend who was a partner in his own business. He was very happy to donate towards our event! He said that he gave to various charities, but he seldom knew how the money was being spent or if it was going where it was intended. It made him happy to give to something local and to know what the money was going to be used for.

This gave me the courage I needed to write letters requesting donations from some local organizations. I was overwhelmed, and still am, by the responses I received. One organization wrote, "Even if mental health is not our mission, the board of directors decided to make a donation because we find what Connections For Mental Health Inc. is doing is important, and somehow even touches our children." This was exciting!

Since the presentation I have received some very encouraging emails and phone calls:
"Mike was really interesting. You had a very good idea to do this!!!"

"You're to be congratulated for all of the work that you have put into the organizing of the day and your commitment to your cause."

"It was a wonderful afternoon in so many ways!! Congratulations!"

"It was a fabulous event and you should be very proud of your contribution to the local community and to the larger community of mental health development. I am pleased to have been included."

"Congratulations on a successful event and all the hard work you put into it. Mike's a very interesting fellow, and easy to admire, and I thank you for inviting me to the presentation, and wonderful refreshments."

"Hard work. Mike did a fabulous job and really hit home with the different issues. I found his message very inspiring. Standing up like he did in front of all those people can make you very vulnerable and I admire his courage for doing that. I wish him well."

"Everything went well, you should be proud."

These last two comments are from people I emailed invitations to, but couldn't come:

"I see that you are still working hard for a good cause, don't give up . . . "

"I heard your event read out today on CBC radio at 12:30 community announcements. Well done, on your hard work putting it together."

This event wouldn't have been possible without everyone's support. I thank everyone who helped to organize and those that came that day to help. A big thank you to all of you who came and also to Townshippers Association for their stamp of approval on this event, and to CIDI 99.1 radio for offering to tape the presentation, which they will air at a later date.

We were very happy to have the following community groups Prevention Suicide, Oasis Mental Health and Pavilion Foster in attendance presenting their services and distributed information pamphlets in English.

We are already planning something for the fall, watch the papers. Connections for Mental Health in Lac Brome is a community group that advocates and provides support for the population of Brome Missisquoi.

Be sure to check out Mike's web site at: www.MikesStory.com. You can also buy The 80/20 Project DVD directly through Mike's web site or from Linda Ransom at pleasantvalley@sympatico.ca or 450-243-0928.

Linda Ransom